Well a short email can keep a girl going these daze

I got a short but reassuring email today!!

I just want to say that this is my first deployment as an Army wife and also the first year of our marriage.
I was worried because I hadn't gotten any communication from him and well a bit hurt. I did snap out of it and realized that right now he has to keep his head in the game. No matter what I trust in our love to make it all the way! So I am going to try to remind myself that he is not doing this to scare me, he has orders and those he must follow.

Every person deals with separation differently and well we just have to adjust to it.


We are doing fantastic with all the obstacles and nay Sayers trying to make our marriage out to be a total dream or some sort of fantasy. One said " you'll see when you get back about getting married to her." Well I can't say I blame them for felling that way I am well over 15 years older then him. On the other hand I don't understand how they couldn't just share in our happiness and joy that we bring each other.

I guess the hardest part for me is wanting to get our first home together and that is not happening. He deserves to come back to a wife and home.

Out for now

Rants of a raving lunatic

Sitting and sitting bye and bye. Haven't even looked you in the eye.

Hey don't worry about me yeah you know I only ever twisted my self around. upside down...wishing I had no frown. That would be true if I knew what to do ........laughing comes in these rhythm's that include you........smile for miles when I think about it............then I step back and think is he thinking Bout something else....does he care what the fuck is going on here with me? i have showed him more ways then one that i love him. maybe i should just go and fuck myself. yeah cause you know i worry about all this stuff and what the fucking hell do i get from it but a big fucking headache

sure thank you I will have a bit of cheese with my wine...red of course.

maybe he doesn't want to because all you ever are is just a pile of nerves, shattered insides and rolls rolls of imagination. clouded by miles of nothing and miles with no understanding..........faster and faster I go and then and then.

I just keep going on and on with this unknowing feeling of disengagement, frustration that can not be cured by wine, men or song....not that I have had the later.....just wine,wine wine.

Well he maybe out in the way side driving in that big thing, I thought he was already !!
what the fuck do I know?

Fucking nothing I hate (bad word) I HATE NOT KNOWING FUCKING HATE IT!

Last we spoke was of strange theories and really all i ever want is to here the words clearly. but they come in a whisper, muffled against the phone. is he ashamed of what we did? does he want to take it back? Or is he drowning himself in other things just to get by? I haven't a clue because I have never been deployed nor will I ever be. I will be here however for him.....I pray he is there for me

sorry ass communication

So how many wife's out there hear from their husbands on a regular basis?
Just wondering if the lack of it is normal?
I wanna keep writing and talking to keep our young marriage going but with out communication (real) every 2weeks on the phone and very short emails. I get discouraged. I know that everyone is different and I know sometimes it is easy to just not think about what you missing out on. I am in need here for some real heart felt conversation.
I work continually and maybe it is because I am sick that I am noticing the lack of him in my life.
I get fucking pissed that I don't seem to be much of an importance.....I thought he was on mission....get an email saying he is going on mission...I thought he was....and this is going to be a long one so basically don't expect any thing from him.

Fuck is it selfish to want to have an email every third or so? Maybe a phone call? I see all these other wife's talking on online and it makes me wonder.

Help.........I want to be supportive but I feel that after a couple of months of deployment we should have this down.

I am just wondering how to handle the next 10 months>